Right, hangovers aside, that's the party season all but done. Happy New Year to all of you, and lets hope that its a good one professionally, personally, financially and, of course, on the cricket pitches of the Leicestershire Senior League.
2009 PRE SEASON
NETS
Its that time of year once again folks and the Nets are upon us. "Really?" I hear you ask. "Hell yes!" I reply. So, get your turkey basted backsides to the Soar Valley Leisure Centre in Mountsorrel THIS Sunday at 12pm (mid day in case you were unsure) and blow those winter cob webs away. Its time for us to get prepared for the tough 2009 season ahead and do ourselves proud on the pitch once more.
No excuses required here, this year its time to prove that BOTWCC are a club that mean business on Thursdays and Saturday afternoons.
So, come on guys, give the season a chance and get some nets in! |
WEB SITE UPDATES
Some of the more alert of you might have noticed that all the 2009 web links are now in place.
You might also notice that most of the old season's data has now been moved to and Archive page, quite cleverly called ARCHIVED DATA. The link is on the left hand menu.
It'll keep the web site slightly better organised and the old stuff we rarely need to refer to will be available but not on every page.
Any Suggestions for how we could organise the web site and make it more user friendly are gratefully received.
Email me at grant@pnut.co.uk |
These are the last of my joke supplies. Surely someone got some cheesy's from
their Christmas crackers???
Email more jokes to me at grant@pnut.co.uk.
Courtesy of MrsSec...
Wife asks her (lazy) husband if he could fix the front steps. Husband says "Hello? have I got B & Q written across my forehead?"
Well could you fix the fridge light then? Husband says "Hello? Have I got Frigidaire written across my forehead?"
Well how about repairing the telly then? Husband says "Hello? Have I got Sanyo written across my forehead?"
Husband gets fed up and goes down the pub. Comes back couple of hours later and notices the front steps are repaired. Goes to the fridge for a beer, the light is working. Sits down with his beer and sees the telly is working. He says to wife, wow how did you get all these jobs done?
"Well" says wife, " I was sitting on the front steps crying when a young man came along and asked what the matter was and I told him all the jobs that needed doing. He said he'd do them if I either made love to him or baked him a cake"
Husband - "Great, what sort of cake did you bake then?"
Wife - "Hello? Have I got Mr Kipling stamped across my forehead?"
Courtesy of Steve Neal...
Forget your problems and read how others put their thoughts into words,
these are genuine excerpts from council complaint letters.
1. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus growing in it.
2. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.
3. It's the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow.
4. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.
5. I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle, very badly, when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.
6. And their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.
7. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off.
8. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?
9. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.
10. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday, and now she is pregnant.
11. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
12. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and 50% are plain filthy..
13. I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.
14. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.
15. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.
16. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces..
17. I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and its now getting too much for me.
18. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.
19. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third, so please send someone round to do something about it.
20. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.
21. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.
22. I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times, but I still have no satisfaction.
23. This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get BBC2.
No wonder our country is in such a bloody state ! ! |
